why the cancer stick......

economics does strange things to man (ok someone would tell me i am being chauvinistic hence i will rephrase that as people). i was trying to read and understand (understanding is a very relative term in economics; it holds value only if the prof understands what u have marked and ur understanding matches that of his) oligopoly. last i had encountered this term was in history in 9th std, wherein it was mentioned how in the rennaisance period, there was wide spread oligopoly in europe. Then it was just another term. Ratta maaro, marks lao :o) Never in my wildest and scariest nightmares had i imagined that this same innocent looking term is goin to drive me to sleep in class and then give me sleepless nights in the room :o)
Hmmm...whatever. So where was I? Yes. So i was reading oligopoly in my room, and i was lying flat on my stomach. Another warning to most engineers who aspire for an MBA. Please DONOT read economics lying down. It will invariably lead to sleep, which in turn will lead to lack of preparation in class, which in turn will lead to OHT (over head transmission) in class, which in turn will lead to useless sleepless nights trying to understand fundae, which in turn will finally lead to screwed up exam (right from the mouth of the horse...hope i got the phrase right :o))
Ok. So the point i was trying to make was..I fell asleep. Not asleep actually. Semi asleep.
Now there is a huge difference between when i sleeping and when i am semi-sleeping. When i am sleeping, I am sleeping :o) But when i am semi-sleeping, i feel like i am doing something else. Like during exams when i am supposed to wake up and study, the alarm rings, and i switch it off. I then think, let me just lie down for 5 more minutes. I sleep for 5 minutes. After 5 minutes, i semi-sleep ie i feel like i am actually revising what i read at night in my head, remembering formulae memorizing definitions, but acutally i am just lying down with drool flowing down my mouth (yes i drool a lot. Just one more fact which i am proud of. All my drool falls on my bed sheet because i dont use a pillow. And for the last 1.5 months in WIMWI, i havent changed my bed sheet. Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeehooooooooooooooooooooooooo. U have to be a guy to understand the pleasure of this. I am not being chauvinistic here (anybody listening :o) ), but only a guy can appreciate the sheer pleasure of smelling his bed sheet that hasnt been washed for months and which has the smell to kill a rat (a bit exagerrated :o)). the feeling that i am the proud possessor of this prized possession is just awesome).
ok coming back to the topic (i do digress a lot), i just defined semi-sleeping. So today oligopoly caused me to semi-sleep for 1 hour (oh yes u can semi-sleep for hours together, TRUST me on this one :o)), and all the while i was having a discussion with someone or with mysef as to why do i smoke. Tht i woke up and immediately lit another cigarrette is a totoally different issue. But the point i am trying to make is that i was involved in the very important and relevant discussion (another point, u can actually remember what u were doing or u thought u wer doing when u r semi-sleeping)
Ah..where was I? Yes. So even after semi-waking up (the oppsite of semi-sleeping), i thought, why do i smoke? I just tried to trace back the history of the cancer stick in my life.
It started with my friend Arnab tempting me to smoke, by offering me free cigs during exam time in first yr. Kamine ne khud to chhod diya, mujhe aadat laga gaya (but to get a friend like that i can smoke a thousand more cigs (that is eqvt ot 5*1000 = 5000 mins = 83 hours of smoking :o)). Ok. So that is how it started. Initially it was just one or two in a week. I didnt buy cigs myself. I just borrowed them from others or took a puff when i saw the beautiful red flame lighting the night sky at a distance :o). Then i felt that smoking helps u stay awake longer. Initially it does. Infact its still one of the reasons i sometimes use to justify to myself why i am smoking my way to the graveyard :o) (my target is 50 yrs. Beyond 50 its going to be difficult to stay alone :o). Would get somewat lonely. Maybe, maybe not. Lets see. As of now the target is 50). it did help for the initial yr or so. But then after that its mainly just a time for relaxation, a time for freeing ur mind and probably think intensely on something or some issue which is haunting u. How does smoke help in that?
I as a smoker can say that smoke helps unite ur body and soul with the almighty so that u become omnipotent :o) But then that would be stretching it too far. BUt then cigarettes do have nicotine which is a stimulant. It does stimulate u and relax u for sometime, and as all learned men say, a relaxed mind thinks better (at least i think that all learned men say that :o))
Its one of the escapes from severe internal conflicts, on decisions which would affect my whole life, decisions which might seem both reasonable and unreasonable at the same time. A cig does not help u take that decision. It just frees ur mind from the conflicts for those 5 precious moments :o)
So u see, each cig i smoke probably takes away 5 physical minutes of my life, but then in return i get 5 minutes of peace (almost :o)). And all learned men ( i hold all learned men of the past responsible for whatever i do :o)) have said, that mental peace is the most imp thing in life. So actually the cancer stick is my mode to attain nirvana
Hence proved that cig smoking is beneficial to mankind

I am so aware of the fact that all my arguments lack logic or scientific basis. I smoke just because i want to. I smoke coz i dont care that my lungs are goin to hell. I smoke coz i love to see the swirls of white fumes emanating from within me. I smoke just for the heck of it :o)