Wednesday, October 24, 2007

The Fart Files

Never have I been subjected to so much fart in such a short period of time :o)I boarded the train from Ahmedabad to Mumbai (my travels n stays in mumbai somehow can never be without experiences :o))

Boarded the lokshakti express. There was this gentleman in my coup. He was arranging his luggage. His butt was turned towards me. Thankfully there was some breeze (at least I think so :o)). Suddenly there was this Poooooooo sound. I thought its probably someone’s shoe or luggage crank.
Then after sometime, I was generally looking into thin air (this is my first journey to Mumbai after my last journey). The gentleman shifted his weight, lifted his butt cheek (don’t ask me which one, I didn’t notice) n again…poooooooooooooooooooooooo
Have never really seen anyone taking so much liberty in asserting one’s right to fart. Do respect this man for that :D

Neway, the amusement started to wane gradually as the farts started coming in a flurry. One, two, three….i lost count. How many in the one hour that I was awake. Everytime, shift of weight, butt cheek rise, a slight pressurized sound from the gut…n then the wind escapes with a subdued yet distinctive sound.
I congratulate myself at looking totally indifferent. It was partly because of the fact that my mind was occupied with the past visit to Bombay, and also because I didn’t want to take this man off ease.

Another phenomenon, one girl was in our coup. Some college student, who could not stop chattering on her phone. Our dear gentleman made it a point (or rather tried his best) to avoid the “breeze” when she was around. There was this one instant when he seemed to be quite at unease, as if holding back emotions, feelings…..wind :D
Then the young lady went to the restroom (maybe…I didn’t follow her). And then came the long Sidewinder…. poooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo…ppooooo…pooooooooooo
Seemed to go on for ever
I went up to my berth after some time n listened to a few more windy expulsions before I fell asleep.

Woke up in the morning, got down from my berth.And was welcomed by a …..Pooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

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12 Comments:

Blogger jakethesnake said...

i just lost my appetite

12:15 AM  
Blogger Anurag said...

@jake
all this by reading it...i was there when it was happening

5:07 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

=))
hehe !! you should have taken a flight from ahm to mumbai na..atleast u wouldnt have had to put up with *the breeze* for such a long time ;P

8:37 AM  
Blogger Anurag said...

@xeres
its all about the money honey...its all bout the money :o)

9:02 AM  
Blogger Zee said...

oh grossssssssssssss!!!!!!!! how did u ever keep a straight face!

2:17 PM  
Blogger Anurag said...

@zee
its an art...all u have to do is think...there is no farting goin on here

Doesnt work though :D

8:42 AM  
Blogger Ajith Prasad Balakrishnan said...

leave all that fart.. Didnt u try to strike a chord with that gal :P ?

5:39 PM  
Blogger Anurag said...

@ajith
saala...yaha breathing tension hai...aur tujhe flirting ki padi hai

9:30 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

remember the whiff of strong farts at around 2 p.m after lunch in class?

7:03 PM  
Blogger Anurag said...

@sanjiv
i remember a few of the keyur farts...bloody they were poisonous man...strong enough to burn ur nasal hair

9:36 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i remember the suju emissions.. boy , was it rich or not!!!

9:31 AM  
Blogger Anurag said...

@sanjiv
good i never sat next to him :P

3:33 PM  

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