Crossroads

Life teaches u a lot.
And one thing I learnt yesterday is that life is a lot about choices.
U come to a crossroad, n u have to make a choice. And u know both the options u have in the end would end up in u being not happy, rather sad.
But then u make a choice. Everyone has to.

Who the fuck says life is beautiful. Just remembered Titto's blog name.
No one dies a virgin. Life fucks everyone.
So apt.

Dhuan

My parents knew that I smoke. But then I haven’t really “openly” smoked at home. Now this time, I have pledged to try n reduce smoking. And my supposed target is 2 per day. Damn. I myself know consciously n unconsciously that I wont be able to cap it at that. But then, let me try my best at whatever is possible.
Neway, now I atleast have the liberty to smoke in my backyard :o) Hence smoking is official now. Just that the cap thingy stays :o)
Talking bout smoke, have u ever seen smoke coming out of ne part of ur body other than the nostrils or the mouth (thru cigs) ? Now maybe some of u fart poisonous gases (have known a few instances wherein the respite of one individual has known to almost burn other people’s nasal hair…keyur gondalia are u listening :D
Neway, right after my arrival here, in less than 24 hours, I could see smoke coming out of my legs. It was actually a coterization session for the corns in my leg. Before each “electrical” burning, I was given a local anesthesia, n DAMN…that is the most painful part. Coz the needle is pushed in, n its moved around once its deep inside, so anaesthesize the area. And when we are talking bout the leg, its more difficult to push in the needle. Also the anaesthesia fluid is quite heavy. Neway, what I am trying to tell is that is VERY painful. I am quite used to taking normal injections. During engineering once, I was diagnosed with irritable bowel syndrome, wherein whatever I ate, left the body in a span of a couple of hours. So the doc in baby memorial gave me a dosage of 2 injections per day for 2 weeks or so. So every afternoon, I would go to the medical centre, n the get the injections. They said it would be less painful in the butt, but u tell an engineering student to take injections in the butt, its hardly plausible that he would oblige. Hence my arms (alternate ones on alternate days) would take the brunt.
Neway, so what I was saying was, on Saturday, after each injection, I could see myself being burnt :o) Hmm…n I didn’t actually dislike the smell.
Neway, right now am resting at home. And the one thing I dislike, rather hate, is having nothing to do. When u have nothing to do by choice, then u still can find things to do like read etc. But when its by force like not being able to move around, then u wont even feel like reading etc. The biggest manifestation of this (n probably other influences, especially some people :o)) is that I donot even feel like watching TV :o)
Neway, it’s the usual me getting bored at home in 2-3 days syndrome. So now counting days to get back to the normalcy of college n work :o)

A beautiful day :o)

Start the day knowing that there still exists goodness in this earth full of vice (4 alarms rang n i didnt wake up. Finally a pious soul Kacchi from the nearby room came n woke me up :D), then think u will sleep again, but get a beautiful wakeup alarm :o) (PRICELESS :D), then watch urself in the mirror n reiterate "I dont look like a monkey", speculate about the weather and go out to find its raining, but still limp ur way outside the campus to get cigs and chai. Get the cigs, get chai, have a rain drenched cig and rainwater mixed chai, water on ur shoulders and not many people around (or kids to accuse u of being a monkey :D), limp back to your room, light another fag and blog...

good morning amigos n senoritas
ITS A BEAUTIFUL DAY :o)

do i...

look like a monkey?
today morning, woke up early since had slept early. went to buy sutta. while coming back, a toddler who had probably learnt to speak a few words, was being walked around by her aaya. i was approaching them from behind. The toddler turns around, looks at me, smiles, points towards me and says "Monkey", "Monkey".
I just smiled, genuinely i smiled :o)

Prayers

I hardly pray.
When I was in college, before every exam I used to pray. I used to say "God, be with me, help me succeed in my endeavours so that I can live up to the standards I have set for myself" and some other crap. I still judge (or rather try to judge) myself on the standards I have set for myself.
Anyway, early in 4th yr, I lost faith. I thought I had become an aetheist. But then gradually, that changed to a point now wherein I acknowledge the presence of someone up there. But also the fact that if something is to be done with my life, I have to do it. "HE" (god is always referred to as male, another thing i would write about in a while) wouldnt have nething to do with it. He may, but I wouldnt call upon HIM to help me out. I have to help myself out.
Even now, sometimes I do call upon HIM for myself, but very rarely. The prayer hasnt really changed. Its more or less the same, wherein I want to be successful by the standards I have set for myself.
Coming to the point of God being called "HE", why not "SHE". Few of the strongest people I have met in my life of 24 yrs n 8 months and probably 24 days now, have been women. And not extraordinary in the sense that everyone knows them or they are idols or something. Its just the simple indian woman. My Ma, who has always been strong throughout her life, raising me and babi in places like Delhi, Andhra and Assam; a friend who changed my perspective a lot on many issues and I would always be thankful to her for that, and now, the person whom I love.
She has displayed amazing strength in such adverse conditions, and is still standing strong. And apart from all this, she has to put up with someone like me, which in itself is strength. But jokes apart, I have always beleived love inherently has respect imbibed in it, and I respect her immensely. I can only dream of being as strong as her.

Now coming back to the issue of praying, there are these times when I still sometimes feel like praying. When I go to temples (when I am taken to temples), I pray for my family, which isnt going through very good times right now. Not financially, but in some other sense. And today I have found another reason to pray.

So god, if u r there somewhere, listening, then listen to me, listen to my prayers. When I pray for the people I love, I am praying for myself, so I am being selfish.
But god listen to me, please...

Khelo WIMWI Khelo...

We at WIMWI (Well known Institute of Management in Western India a.k.a IIMA) play this game 3 times a yr starting term 3, then in term 4 and then term 5. Have played two innings already. N damn, is it exciting :D
The bidding timings are announced. Its all managed by the student's academic council n they have the toughest time during bidding. N they do a great job always.
But the fun lies in the process.
There are several courses up for bids. But usually some of them are sought after the most. So for the first 1.5 hours of the 1 hr 45 minutes, the bids move by a point or so. Its basically people sensing the market and trying to find out how much interest others have in teh course. Also we have fixed number of bidding points that we can use (oh forgot to mention everything is online, software hai).
But then the last 5 minutes are pure pure panic :D
Points go sky high. People are left with no point n the bidding keeps rising. One has to remove points from one subject n put in another if he/she chooses that the other subject is what they want. Then u cant remove points from a subject u r winning, till u start losing it ie u have been outbid. So if u put too many points on a subject, then u would be at a loss for points in another.
Then if u uncheck a subject without removing the points first, then u lose the points along with it.
And the best (i find it worst) part is the funda of X. The bidding is for 1 hr 45 minutes + X minutes, where X is a random number generated by the system. This is ensure that people dont hoard points till the last moment and outbid serious bidders who have been helping to determine the market prices for the subjects.
Now X can stop any moment coz no one knows what X is. So during X, bidding, or removing points n putting it on another subject etc are dangerous, but people do do it.

Last term, during X i lost a subject i was bidding for from the beggining, and picked up two which are the biggest pains in my arse this term.
This bidding, I picked up two subjects i wanted by putting enough number of point over the minimum bid. BUt then during X, there was another subject I wanted, and had points also, but didnt have the gurda to bid for it, just in case someone outbid me in the other two subjects and then i dont have points to bid higher for them. Coz i seriously wanted these two subjcts, since then my week gets over in 3 days :D muwahahahaa
so next term i have classes only 3 days a week :D n baaki 4 din, karenge kuch. kaafi plan hai. there are many big cities near ahmedabad :D

So right now, me already waiting for the next bidding to happen in next term

P.S. : Did i mention that myself and Titto have a common hobby. Discussing the time table, studying it and "analysing" which possible subjects to take in the next term. So that would start in 5th term again. Right now, exams just round the corner, and also many projects up my arse. So finally having to work in tucchadom. But chalta hai. Only 2 weeks na :o)

The Return of Bataas...

If they can make a movie on The Return of the King (LOTR) then why cant they make one on my return into the world of blogging again?
Hmmmm...good thought. Will have to brainstorm over it :o)

Hey dost log.
Have been away for a long long time. But then Laina put it correctly in her comment. Life has been a dream lately and am still not out of it and hopefully would never come out. Its a dream one sees with open eyes. But then that would be another post :o)

Right now, rather till now, have been thoroughly enjoying second yr ie tucchadom. Its a phenomenon that exists only in IIM Ahmedabad (so Kandy dont be happy and earnestly wait for 2nd yr, wont help :D).

When life is both slow n fast at the same time, when u have so much time that u dont know wat to do with it, and then suddenly there is no time at the same time, then u know that u r a tuccha. 

Understood? No? Dont worry. Its like watching gunda :D Try not to make sense out of it n then everything just falls into its right place :D

So me has been thoroughly enjoying this life now. Gymn regularly but then not to built aolle sholle but rather to lose some weight. When i left WIMWI for summers, i was 75, the Hong Kong food made sure i come back to Ahmedabad at 73.5 kgs (that is actually strange because "most" people including ones in Hong Kong put on significant amounts of weight in summers. I guess i should thank the regular 20 pack of cigs for this :o) Thanks o my dear cancer stick. U r the one for me) Then after coming here, was hovering around the same weight. Tried out GM diet ie General Motors diet. Its a sick form of food to lose weight by starving urself. It was started by those sick Americans. Neway, could go thru it for one evening only. That was the first day, and only water melon n musk melon was being served. There are about 6 meals a day in GM diet. I ended up having only 3. N that night, had to wake up late (in tucchadom one wakes up late for no particular reason). So at around 3:30 AM, could not stand the pangs of hunger any longer, went to the night canteen and had chicken soup. Next day morning, gorged 2 gobi parathas. GM diet gaya g***d marane.

Then turned to the gymn (had been going before also) to lighten up the path to weight loss. And over the last one month, have come down from 74 odd to 69. That is good.
The mess food is also to thank for that. When one is on a weight loss regime, he would try to avoid excessively oily food. And our mess makes sure that such a criteria leaves with with only one choice of food on most days: daal, chawal, roti and raita. So I am not the only one to take credit for losing the 5 kgs in a month.

Also, had had a target of getting into a jeans which i bought from roadside n since day one, which would not even slip up my arse (in 3rd term). Now can easily slip into them :o)

Muwahahahahahahahaahahah. Bataas khush hua.

Actually that has been most of what I am doing. And as I mentioned bout the beautiful dream which has I am living right now and would live for the rest of my life, that I would tell u guys some other day.

For now, this is my return post. So keep watching this blogspace for more posts in the near future.

Adios.