Cocoon

Was one of those days when I was feeling down. Generally.
Now the people who have been around me ie in my college may attribute many reasons to it. But then it was one of those days when I myself am not sure why I am feeling down. So i decided to leave trying to pin point the reason n just go along with the flow. N that called for sleeping for hours n hours together.
Still the day (in the sense of feeling in down) isnt over, but then have to wake up sometime :o)

But then this post is not for that.
I have friends here who try to help me out when such bad days occur. There are people here and away who are or would be really concerned on such occasions.
But i myself, on most occasions, build this thick cocoon around myself and dont let neone in. I still dont know why? May be i am too vain to take sympathy from others. But then these people wont sympathize. They would just listen as friends.
Maybe I am not sure that these people would understand. But then how do i know till i tell them :o)

I dont know if henceforth i am goin to tell them when such bad days occur n ask them to listen to me. kya karu aisa hi hoon mai :o)

Chalo time to get back to work.
Adios

Coldcall :o)

Had my first cold call of the term today.
Slept late at night. Rather slept early in the morning. Bole to 7 baje. Till then i was thinking of my life's short n long term goals (yeh ek lambi dukh bhari daastaan hai...kabhi phursat se sunaunga yaaro :o))
Eco class was interesting. So managed to keep awake. Mkting class is usually very interesting. But today most of it was overhead transmission. So dozed off. Gawali was sitting next to me. He kept waking me up. On any other day, I would have been grateful. But today, I wanted to sleep :o)
But could not manage much sleep in that class eihther.
In accounting (oh yes accounting, my perennial source of nightmares) the class was important so i managed to stay awake. But my eyes were red (so i was told). But i didnt sleep. Our prof is a very good teacher. But cold call karte hai. Cold call is something like u are called to answer a question ( n i beleieve it also includes a clause tht one is least expecting to be called when he/she is called....only then is the call a cold call, but then people have differing views on this ... i myself have differing views from time to time :o)). So one cold call gone. I am safe. 2 cold calls gone. I am still safe. 3rd cold call. The prof is looking at me. My fraind, how do u do this? I wasnt expecting to be called. But then I sit in this CP corridor with Pinky and Gutter sitting right in front of me :o). So this had to happen one day. So it happened today.

I was lookin at the case to answer (thankfully i had read the case). The prof asks next, Wan did u have ur breakfast? I was a bit bewildered. I said 9 AM sir. Then he looked at the clock n said, today also u are looking very drowsy. The last day also u were looking very drowsy but then i had dismissd it as after affects of diwali :o)
In the end i managed to answer the question. So that was a nice to end it :o)

Other than that, the day has been not good, but then one conversation of 35 odd minutes has made my day beautiful. Hence i am thankful for that (not to God :o))

Adios

Party Time

The last few days have been good (n bad, but let me just narrate the good stories :o))
Lemme start with after the bike accident. That has been what, 10 days now (my wounds are still not healed completely but chalta hai :o))

So between then and now, there were about 5 or 6 working days. With the beginning of the week (last week) we again started running our algorithm of determining which "surprise" quiz would be held on that day. Last term our algorithm proved to be very robust with almost every "surprise" quiz being predicted to perfect precision. But this time, our algorithm seems to be losing strength. Quizzes dont happen for days, when every day we mug the same things again n again n come prepared (or so we like to think, the grades say otherwise anyway). N then in one of those days, when we say, "Itne din se MANAC ka quiz nahi hua, aaj to hona hi hai"....we have a finance quiz :o) Now at no point of time should the readers of this post think that these terms or subjects are something I know. These are just terms for me. I would accept that they are names of subjects, but till this point of time in this term, all they have meant to me is entries in the time table, sleepy classes or sleepless classes with over head transmission, screwed up grades and obviously scary nightmares :o)

Ok. So the point I was trying to make is our algorithm is all screwed up. That was that. Last weekend was also Diwali, n we had a holiday on Saturday :o). Me n one of my friends decided "We wont let this weekend to get screwed. We will mug. We will mug"........................................all we did was sleep :o) Hence we proved a theorem which holds in WIMWI that when one has time he/she (people like me atleast) would invariably waste it, and when we dont have time, we will work our arses off, and of course crib crib n crib (i have actually learnt not to crib but just look up towards the heavens and give a sarcastic smile, sayin "aaj phir maar li ?!")


Anyway so diwali came. Few of my friends went home. Few didnt. We celebrated diwali here. It was fun. I actually burst the big bombs like hydrogen bombs and lakshmi bombs by propelling them into thin air by the unparalleled strength of my bhujaye (read hands)....the unparalleled strenght was a bit subdued since i had to use my right hand to throw the bombs since the left hand is injured. Hence many of the bombs burst at pretty close distances. But i like the fearless hero turned my back after every throw (there is actually a scientific reason for this. 4 months of constant marwane ke baad ek kambatkh bomb kya bigadega :o) muwahahahahahahaha... not funny?....ok fine) So basically we had a lot of fun.
Here during diwali many of the dorms are decorated. We have a tradition of being a lazy dorm. Still with a lot of effort we did manage to put a few wax lamps in place (which got extinguished in some time, lekin koshish to ki thi na ).
Also during the bursting of crackers, one of the rockets propelled by a fellow WIMWIian took fantasy on me n my dorm and actually chased us ....n i am not joking out here.
So diwali was good.
Other than that, saw a recording of one of our class presentations in a communication subject. We laughed for 2 hours. Major bloopers commited :o). I said, " We will provide u with Indoor sports facilities...like Indoor squash". Lugaai said "I have amongst me a friend...." and some other major bloopers which u have to see to beleive :o)
Neway, that was that. Also talked about life to friend. Was a nice talk.


N yes, yesterday had a DP. Kaun kambakth kehta hai ki yeh dry state hai :o). Drank a bit. Was in total control :o). One of the reason being did not want to fall n injure myself again. Also didnt want to talk my heart out and give masala to gossip on to other people. Danced a bit. Chatted with people. Gave some gyan (i guess so). There was this really nice phone call which came in between :o) And add to that when i come back to my room in the old campus i find out there is not power :o)
Neway that wasnt something nice to happen but it still happened. So basically that was what has happened over the last few days. Today again slept in a presentation (I am making a reputation for myself :o))
Signing off now. Gotto go :o) Have 3 lectures to attend tomoro, n hopefully stay awake in at least 2 :o)
Adios

Diary

I am resuming writing my diary from today. Its not a daily diary. Its just random thoughts, rahter incidents and the thoughts which emanate from them, and also thoughts which emanate from things which have happened, or which might happen, which i want to happen, which i donot want to happen etc etc etc
Why this sudden decision?
I used to write a diary. Then i thought blog would be an alternative. But then blog cant be wat a diary is. There are so many thoughts one cant pen down in a blog. So dear diary, I am sorry I was disloyal to u for sometime, but then I am coming back now :o)
As for blogging, that will continue :o)

Am I a good man?

I dunno the answer to this question. But then somehow back in engineering or even here in college, I have people who trust me. People who, I think, feel comfortable with me.
Why?
My parents trust me. I havent broken their trust.
My very close friends trust me. I havent broken their trust.
My good friends trust me. I havent broken their trust either.
I beleive that I havent broken the trust the most indivs who have trusted me.
But then there are times when u really want to earn, not get, earn the trust of certain people. Maybe u even have. But u cant be sure. U want to stand by those people. U want to be there for those people when they need someone. U want to just sit beside them in silence.
What am in writing???????????????????? I dunno

Guys Night Out

The week got over yesterday. It was a long week. Nowadays every week starts with the wait for the weekend. Reminds me of Engineering :o)

Neway, had a quiz in the afternoon. Have no idea how it went :o)

Cutting short the day to day crap, today we had an intersection cricket match. We were the better team :o) but still today wasnt our day. Post match played a bit of badminton.

Then on Randolf's suggestion few of us (Myself, Moods, Lugaai, Public, Maclo, Masho, Randolf, Quicky and Jamna) decided to go out on a ride, a bike ride. Where? No idea. Just go out :o)

So we moved on to MDC (its this building in our campus). There gradually all of us assembled. But there was just one problem. There were 4 bikes and 9 people. After much strategising, we decided that the only feasible solution was for me n Jamna to board Marzi's (Public's) bike (a beautiful enfield). So that we did. Hence the journey to nowhere began :o)

We drove on. Marzi's bike is awesome. Great pickup and awesome speed n balance. Just that due to the heaviness and the fact that 3 people were on the bike, it was difficult to control the bike when slow (felt the instability on many occasions due to slow speed at junctions etc).

We just drove on since we didnt have any destination in mind. On the fly we decided to go to Gandhinagar. The whole drive was awesome. The wind blowing on our faces, the slight chill, n the sense of freedom from all the quizzes and grades n summers etc etc. It was great.

After some more time, we decided to turn back and head towards Ahmadavad. On a check naka the police caught us, coz we were 3 people on one bike. Moods escaped with his bike (Karizma) which he later said, was because he didnt have his papers n NOC with him at that time.

Neway, good that Marzi is Gujju and so he handled the situation very well. The police told us to not ride three on a bike, and also to not roam around after 12 n be in college (moral police :o)). No jurmana was collected (even though one of the constables was repeatedly suggesting the same)

The next stop was a small dhaba where we have Poha and chai. It was refreshing. Masho disappeared in between for about 15 mins. He told us that he had gone to releive himself. But then we have different theories to explain his diappearance (which i cant mention here :o))



From there, we decided to stop at a dhaba in a petrol pump some distance away. We reached that place and ate our hearts out. Moods bought a pack of moods (just to get himself photographed with the pack). Me too posed with Marzi's andMood's bikes :o)

Next stop was college. It was almost 6 in the morning (we had started at around 2 at night). On the way back, a dob came on the way of our bike, and resulted in losing his/her leg(s) and all three of us falling off a moving enfield. Good thing (lucky actually) that nothing major happened to any of us. Actually nothing happened at all. I have a couple of major scratches (like the skin peeling off :o)) and so does Marzi. Since Jamna was sitting at the rear seat, he was least bruised and me n Marzi were kinda equally bruised.

THe bike was still moving. So we reached the college. I got basic first aid from Maclo in his dorm. Now have taken a bath, washed the would with dettol. And applied this cream. Duuno its exact application but must be to alleviate the pain and avoid any possible infection yaar. :o)

Chalo me too sleepy. Just now have had to change 3-4 lines of qhrwcwe rjwwl (see this is wat i typed in my sleep :o))
So i guess i will hit the bed, since also have to wake up by 10 for class in the morning.
Adios

P.S. Wanted to write more, but too sleepy to continue.

Interests in CV

Possible entries:
-- Like coming 3rd in 5th Semester in Engineering
-- Like hosting cultural activities as convenor of events
-- Like winning prizes in Inter University Tournaments
-- Like being appraised at high performance ratings

If this does not make sense, dont worry. Blogging at 5 in the morning is supposed to be non sensical :o)

P.S. These entries are not my interests. These are possible interests of a few of my friends here :o)

Books......

A tag by hitchhiker, and then something i had always wanted to write bout.
Havent read many books, but intend to. N i will :o)

So here goes the list :o)

1) One book that has changed my life

Wel this is difficult. Some of the books i have read had a deep impact on me.

But then i beleive the one which i can say changed my life would be Atlas Shrugged.
Why?
I never looked at Atlas Shrugged from the point of view of economics ie capitalism n socialism or problems in the society. That thought never crossed my mind even once when i was turning those pages.
The only theme that books presented to me was emotions, human emotions. Human strengths. Weaknesses.
Strenght of character of characters like Hank Rearden, Dagny Taggart, Ellis Wayat (intentionally leaving out John Galt. I dont like that character that much :o) :o)). Or the power n profoundness of decisions, no matter how odd they seem, like the ones taken by Hank Rearden.
It corroborated some of my beliefs, not by preaching or by projecting another view of life. No not in that way. Its just that it helped me introspect into some aspects in my life and take a stand.


2) One book u have read more than once
I have read "The Monk who sold his Ferrari" more than once. More than once bole to twice or thrice. Its because i did try (n still do) to practice a few of the teachings of that book.
I find its teachings very simple yet very profound.

Another book i will read again someday is "The Alchemist".


3)One book u would want on a deserted island

Dunno. I would rather have a friend i can talk to. Or in the worst case scenario a diarty (empty of course) where i can write my heart out :o)


4) One book that made you laugh

This a difficult one. I have to rekindle my memory a bit coz i do remember there were a couple of books which made me laugh, really laugh.

Yes. I did laugh a lot while reading this Dilbert book. Dont remember the name. But then was a software engineer then. N i could relate to so many of the cartoons. So it was ironical n funny :o)


5) One book that made me cry

Many actually. The kite runner. I almost cried while reading it.
Then Love Story and Only Love by Erich Segal.
N this might sound funny to many, but i almost cried reading the ending of "One Night at a call center" when the hero embraces the heroine (i guess i am a die hard bollywood fan :o))


6) One book u wish had been written

A book on........forget it. It will never be written. I will have to write it myself. Coz it will be bout something very near n dear to me.


7) One book you wish had not been written

Cant think of any from among the ones i have read :o)


8) One book that you are currently reading
Have started "A Little Girl's Diary". Havent been able to read much of it though. Hope to complete it soon (read the end of this term :o))


9) One book that u want to read
Its not that the book i mention is something i want to read. Its something i will read. Its "Miss America By Day". I dunno when i will be reading it, i just know that i will be reading it.

Suit

I bought the first suit of my life. With my own money.
Last week. Raymond.

When I looked at myself in the mirror (ok i hadnt shaved for a week or so, but then the charisma n personality of a person does not get shadowed by an unshaven beard :o))

Gosh was i happy! :o)

Lies

My friend asked me, "Do u lie?"
I said yes.

I asked myself later, "Why do i lie?"
Is it that i like lying? Why do I have to lie?

THe answer was, I dont have to. And i dont lie to people i care bout. People i like.
N even in other cases when i do, its never to hurt anyone.

N if i tell someone i wont lie to that person, then i wont. Its a promise that i make to myself more than to anyone else. N i always keep it. Have kept it till now. N will always keep it.

I am a star :o)

I was bout to hit the bed. Went to titto's room for a second. Phatlee was there. He asked me if i could act. I said "Of course dude" ( u can read bout my acting skills on a previous post bout t-nites :o)). So he said "Ok we are shooting in 15 minutes".

Now an actor is just natural. He/she does not need time to prepare. And as u people might have already guessed by now, acting comes naturally to me. Its inside me. Outside me. Around me. Everywhere (shayad thoda zyada ho gaya). Ok so wat i was saying was that i obliged.

It was this small 2 minute shot for phatlee's assignment (dunno which one). The scene was -- I am a totally frustrated fucha, pissed off with life and with the pressure here (sounds familiar :o)). I am coming back from the lib with a book and on the way meet this tucha (second yr) , playd by titto, who shatters my self confidence even more by saying one has to be stronger than this.

Then i am really depressed and then another good tucha (played by scale) comes in and consoles me.


I am walking up the stairs, with this book i have no idea about. I meeet titto. I cant suppress my laughter which explodes out. Phatlee does some classy craftmanship with the digicam to not record me giggling. Titto gives me gyan. I regain my composure. THen i go to the room, dump the notebook and say my dialogue. Scale comes in and consoles me. I forget each n every dialogue of mine. Scale tells me "saale u have forgotten ur dialogue". But me like the quintissential actor goes on blabbering something according to the scene. Swanky craftmanship by Phatlee again makes sure Scale's comments arent recorded. In the end everyone is happy.

(The part with me n scale had to be repeated once but then finally everything came out fine)

I could not get the essence of the whole thing but was fun.

please dont applaud this perfect performance. i am too humble for that :o)

So u see, if u people want my autographs now, plz do get in touch with me. Later on i might not have time :o)

James

What is the probability that the game will be over with the 6th ball?

I wasnt sure bout the answer. Was lookin at one of my classmates solving the questions on the board, n praying to god that dont let my roll number be generated today so that i dont have to solve any problem on the board.

Suddenly James was there. James also wanted to learn probability, or so i thought. He was pretty near the board. It was like he wanted to imbibe all the knowledge today itself.

But then how long can someone be captivated by probability. I cant. N i guess James also lost interest. So he started moving around.

We switched off the fans. For James sake. We didnt want James to be caught unaware by a moving fan.

James felt much at home in our class. He moved around. Then as a good friend sensing our requirement for a fan, he himself started pedalling the fan. God bless his soul. He moved it single handedly for bout a minute. But then how long could he continue without rest.

So he also stopped after a while and resumed listening to the class.


James is a pigeon.


Looking forward to meeting James in the next class too.

Paul

Hi
Have u met Paul?
He has come to our college for a week long management development program.
Right now he does not have a room. Since he knew titto from before and is from Mumbai, so he is putting up with titto itself.
Met him bout half n hour back.

Paul was happily having his dinner of juicy insects and lazing around, crawling on the wall near the tube light.













Paul is a lizard, a house lizard actually. Its a Hemidactylus flaviviridis ( i think that is wat his scientific name is). But we call him Paul.

Hope Paul gets to sleep tonight.
Good night Paul.

The Saviour

Was talking to a friend on the phone the other day (intercom hai…talk for as long as u want :o)). It was after 2-3 in the night. Suddenly there was a knock on my door. I opened the door. The exchange student living two rooms away was at the door. He was kinda pretty drunk and he asked me if I could help him out with a problem.

Now I have been drunk myself many times and hence could empathize with him. Hence I hung up the phone for the moment and went along to help him. He had the key to his lock in the lock and asked me to help him open the door.

I smiled. I thought..Happens yaar, after a couple of pegs, its difficult to open the door lock (though I was a bit surprised that this was the case even though the key was in the lock :o)).

So like the hero of the day, I walked up to the lock, stared hard at it, held the key, turned to the exchange student, gave him a smile that was a mixture of “Don’t worry, bataas is here” and “I have drunk much more than this but have never needed help in opening my own room” and turned the key…….

It wont turn.

Try again. Same result. Again. Same result. Sit down next to the lock. Listen to the movements of the levers inside the lock. Feel how they are moving (I was feeling like a lock pick :o)), and turn the key slowly.
It still wont turn. Press on the hook and try to turn the key.
It wont turn.

This went on for over 5 mins. I was beginning to get a bit worried. Not really because of the lock. But since there was no other place and the student would have to stay in my room if his room didn’t open. And it wasn’t a really fancy proposition. I like my room all to myself (no double meaning intended).

Then a miracle happened. An angel came to my rescue. The angel was….Parachute coconut oil :o)
In goes parachute, 1 more minute of lock picking, and here we have an open lock, with me again with a smile, this time though a mixture of relief and gratitude (to parachute :o)).

The student told me….Thanks dude, u r my saviour. I just looked at Parachute, and mentally repeated the same to it :o)

Why this difference?

Was having dinner with a friend a few days back. Some discussion started bout marriage. Then it veered into non marriage ie remaining unmarried.

My friend said its still ok for guys to remain unmarried, but its not at all expected from girls (in India).

Why?

If in our society we can, though not readily, accept a man deciding to spend his life alone, then why should the rules be different for a lady?

I know both times and mindsets are changing in our country, but we still have a long way to go before we can actually boast of accepting the equality of the sexes.

Nirdosh

Its this beedi like herbal smoking stick. Its for helping cig addicts get off the cancer stick

Tried Nirdosh for a couple of days. Now back to my dear Wills Navy Cut :o)

P.S.: Smoking herbs is called Dhumpan and smoking cigs is called Dhumrapan. Muwahahahahaha…….. Doesn’t make sense? Don’t worry. Just a piece of unsolicited gyan :o)

Dussera at Prayaas school

I took a decision today. On one hand I had truck loads of mugging to complete, n i hadnt started nething. On the other hand, I wanted to go and see dussera being celebrated at the Prayaas school.
I chose the latter. The result is that I wont be sleeping for more than 3-4 hours tonight. But no regrets, I am happy bout my decision.

Lemme first tell u wat Prayaas is.
Prayaas is the name of a student initiative started by the students here.
They run a small school which imparts basic knowledge to children from the slums. Also conduct outings and workshops etc for these children.

I have volunteered to join. I went to the Prayaas school the other day. Saw the children there. It was a mixed feeling. On one hand I felt thankful for what I had. And on the other hand, the feeling that I should n would do something for the society was reaffirmed.

But wat I felt best bout was the faces of these children. No sadness. No tension. No worries. The ignorance of childhood reflected on their faces. The ignorance which so many of us would give anything to get back.

I saw a couple of guys playing with a pencil box (remember the pencil boxes with a maze in the cover, wherein u have to find the way to move the ball to a specified place). Reminded me of one of my friends in school in Delhi who used to get all these fancy things to class and I always used to look at them wide eyed and always had a mixed feeling of jealousy an amusement.

God I wish I could be child again.

Ok. Now coming back to today's Dussera celebrations at the Prayaas school. We made a ravan ( i could not locate the prayaas office so could not contribute to the making of the ravan :o( ) and took it to the school.

I was a bit late in reaching the school. When i reached there, the ravan was standing there in the middle of the courtyard (Prayaas school is not a school actually. The students are taught in chaupal of the municipal school). The children were sitting there, all in rows on the ground, with expectant eyes. Few of us (not me :o)) gave them some gyan on dussera and Gandhiji.

Then a few crackers were burst. The light in their eyes and the joy on their faces was brighter than the fireworks. And I am not exagerrating here. Few of us (again not me :o)) held the hands of a couple of children and let them burst the crackers too.

I had to come back at that time coz i had some other work lined up. But then now that I am feeling sleepy and still have over 2 hrs of mugging to do, when i look back at the decision i took, i can remember the smiling faces of those children. And then i know that i made the right decision. No. There was no decision to be made. It was something I had to do. Coz the very thought of those children and their joyous faces brings a smile on my lips too.
Adios

split personality??

cant understand something.
How can the same person not give a damn bout wat his actions are perceived as by most people?
But at the same time, really care bout how wat he does or says affects a few people?
Dunno. Or maybe i know.
Yes i guess i know. But then since i know i dont need to put it down on paper (read blog :o))
Adios

reasons

do we have a reason for everything? like a reason for being happy, or for being sad, or for feeling down, or for feeling elated
do we need a reason for everything? why is it that whenever something happens we ask "How? Why?"
n why is it that many a time when the why question pops up, i am totally blank?
wasnt that question ironical? I am asking why is it that i cant answer why on so many occasions :o)